To no longer be awakened at the crack of dawn on Easter morning by two exuberant little children is both a good thing and a bad thing. It is a good thing because the Easter Bunny is not quite ready, and it is a bad thing because it feels like all that tradition and fun is gone by.
We even forgot to dye eggs this year. We do it every year on Holy Thursday. I did eventually buy the eggs and dye, but the package has been sitting on the counter for two days without anyone mentioning it.
I suppose I could be sad about the loss of the expectancy and innocence, but I'm considering skipping that. For every little thing that I notice has passed, there is something to be thankful for to take its place. For example, getting enough sleep. Or having time to put the last minute touches (okay, start putting together) the baskets. If my children were still bounding in to wake me at their age and size, I think I would be worried.
I look at other people's babies and small children and I smile. I tweak their toes and goo-goo at them. I enjoy their existence without needing one of my own. (I happen to feel that way about dogs too.) While my younger friends are frantically looking for a sitter, I am enjoying my freedom to come and go. I am counting down the days when my daughter has her license, so I can send her out for Mexican food. I have paid my dues; I have enjoyed that innocent time. Now it is time for the next phase.
Until grandchildren.
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